Legion - Seminyak - Ubud

Yesterday evening is up there on the perfect nights list. A balmy summer evening, post surf tiredness / aches dismissed with a few cold Bintangs: we were ready to head out into the evening.

We opted to head up to Seminyak and (despite my preference for Rough Guides) opted for the Lonely Planet 'if you go one place go here' restaurant recommendation.

Tiny wooden tables, covered in candles, sat in a tropical garden under a canopy of woven tree branches. Delicious food and wonderfully thoughtful service, the staff even bring over mosquito spray as you arrive!

We then headed to Ku de Ta. Possibly the most written about bar in Bali. Seafront views (tick), dress code (tick), inordinately expensive cocktails (tick), 'lounge' music (tick). I have to say, despite the aforementioned list possibly making it too fancy to be fun, it was amazing. We had beautiful sea views and the bar has huge lights onto the waves so surf watching is a must. I got thoroughly drunk on KDT coladas (yes, of course I sang the song, many times). I was also drinking something called an 'automobile'.

Talking of automobiles there were three young (UK) 'lads' on holiday sat next to us (my gap year funding never covered the cost of that kind of caper!). Anyway, at one point, prior to ordering a further round of beers, they asked the waiter "can you drink and driver here?" On receiving a response to the affirmative they high-fived and we still ordering rounds as we left. Madness! (Cue muttering, what has happened to the youth of today etc). However, even this could not spoil my utterly, utterly top evening.

DW steered me home (did I mention the colada's had nitrogen foamed coconut topping?) and somehow I awoke this morning sans hangover. Miraculous, that is the power of good cocktails.

Today we walked through Legion and Seminyak and played 'spot the Bintang'. It is a very simple game. If you see someone wearing a Bintang singlet you shout "Bintang, [x] o'clock'. Now last night I had noticed that the dress code for a number of bars was very specific, stating "no alcohol branded singlets" and wondered why on earth that would be a specific requirement. Having spotted many, many Bintang singlets today (Bintang is the local beer) I now understand why...

...and why? Oh yes, Bali is ozzie paradise. I have now learnt what a 'bogan' is (sort of equivalent to chav) and also how to identify one. Frequently found holidaying in Bali, wearing a Bintang beer singlet. Hence the dress code signs. All clear now?

We have not bought Bintang branded clothing yet. But I feel a comedy photo moment coming on...

After a wander around Seminyak (more high-end fashion shops that you would have believed possible) we decided to head up to Ubud. Now don't get me wrong, Seminyak is a nice place but two nights is plenty, unless you want to lounge by the pool or suf.

Now, being organised, we had pre-booked a driver, agreed a time / place / price etc. However (in true 'you're a tourist' style) he arrives and doubles the fare. Hmm. So a quick call was made to a taxi driver encountered earlier in the day who had insisted we were fools for going with anyone else as he would 'make us happy'.

So off we headed. Stop one was at the Bali Orchid Garden. Absolutely beautiful but also hilarious as the woman showing us round spent the trip making us pose for photos around various flowers saying to DW "now kiss your wife, 1-2-3". Absolutely brilliant. We have one of us 'clasping' hands around a bougainvillea, kissing behind orchids. You should have seen our faces.

Next was the tour of the shops. You know you are going to be ripped off and you also know you have no way of preventing the detours en-route. All credit to our taxi driver he told us how much the shops would give him if we spent money. So stop two was a silversmiths (I picked up a nice 30th gift for a friend) and stop three was a batki shop to buy saris. Another hilarious incident as I now have a photo of DW being forced into a pink and orange sari by two men. I'm open to offers for that one. In Bali you have to wear a sari (regardless of gender) if you are visiting a temple. Otherwise you will not be permitted. So two saris were purchased (sadly not the pink version).

We were shattered by this point and managed to cry off stops four and five (wood carving and paintings) and headed to our hotel. Which is where I am now. On our private terrace. Yes, we have a private terrace. They bring the breakfast here. And this costs GBP45 a night for both of us. Is bliss.

Right, massage calling.